My wife and I have been married for over nine years. Unfortunately, we couldn't enjoy our sex life to the fullest like many people here do. This story is (a condensed version of) our story. It was written to encourage you and to tell you how we overcame some of the sexual obstacles in our lives.

We have known each other since the fifth grade. During those years, my wife and I were classmates. It was then that I realized that she was largely defined by her grades. When she performed well academically, she could feel the love from her parents, but when her grades were lower than the required level, she felt unloved. About nine years later, we started dating. At that time, we were preparing for graduation. I wanted her to understand that being loved doesn't necessarily mean being excellent. My dream was to give her unconditional love. About two years later, we got married. I still dreamed of her seeing what a family full of love and beauty looked like. At that time, I didn't know that this would be such a challenging task.

Our marital life began with some sexual problems. After my wife reached orgasm, she soon lost her arousal or began to experience pain. I never penetrated her or even got close to her. During masturbation, there was no such problem. We decided to see a doctor. At the age of 21, I felt something was wrong. We blamed the cause on my being too young, lacking experience, or being numbed by pornographic films. Since my teenage years, pornography has always been an addiction that I have tried to overcome. I had hoped that marriage would help. But it turned out to be a struggle against various temptations. I got caught up in it, confessed to my wife, hurt her, sought forgiveness, and started anew.

Shortly after our first wedding anniversary, my wife was diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive disorder. A few days after her second treatment, she broke down. She was hospitalized for a month and received treatment. In the following years, she broke down again, was hospitalized for a few weeks, and received a lot of treatment. During this period, as long as we cooperated with the obsessive-compulsive disorder, the sex life was possible. Sometimes things went smoothly and we had sex according to the rules of the obsessive-compulsive disorder. Sometimes I had to take care of both of us, making her reach orgasm first, then leaving the house and masturbating in the next room. I thought the obsessive-compulsive disorder was our deepest low point... Oh, my goodness, I was wrong.

During the time when my wife was undergoing treatment, we had to confront more issues related to sexual dysfunction. At first, my wife merely hinted to me that during the treatment she had discovered some problems, but she couldn't tell me. For over a year, I had no idea where the problem lay. Before our sexual life even began, it ended, leaving only the act of getting into bed and hugging, with me holding her breasts. This act of cupping her breasts was the minimum I could tolerate. Sometimes, I even couldn't do it. When my wife finally told me what had happened, a completely new gap opened up again. She had suffered from sexual abuse when she was young... The more this matter sank in, the more we could understand each other. I couldn't even ejaculate next to her, which was a form of protection for her. We weren't sure what would happen if I ejaculated inside her.

In the spring of 2014 (about a year after I realized I was being abused), my wife said that she was now at a stage where she could start improving her sex life. We found a therapist and had several sessions with her. The situation seemed very promising. We discovered that our marital bed was full of sexual obstacles for us. In fact, it was one of the hardest places to have sexual activities. Sexual abuse was probably the cause of this situation, but we weren't sure. On the other hand, playing with sex in the shower worked very well. We had some really wonderful experiences. I could even sit in the bathtub, watch her take a shower, and masturbate until I reached climax. This shower game was a completely new level for us. (And I liked my wife's wet body)

Since the summer of 2014, my wife had to go out to work because we couldn't find any jobs nearby. The weekend became our new turning point. All the psychological therapy exercises were ineffective. On Friday nights, my wife's emotions became very distant, to the extent that we usually didn't consider having sex until Sunday night. She often forced herself to adapt, which was quite contradictory. The good aspect was that sexual life didn't completely stop. The bad aspect was that she hurt herself.

For me, this period has been very tough. By Friday night, I was already quite excited, but I still had to wait for the date on Sunday night...

On the weekend before Christmas, we received a real gift. We were lying naked on the bed, and my wife reached out to touch my penis (she could barely reach it), and suddenly became excited. She asked me to put on a condom, then adjusted my penis to be in front of her vagina, and began to slowly insert it.

After more than two years (I didn't calculate the exact duration, but if I had known it was so long, I'm sure I would have gone crazy), we finally had real sex! …… It happened without any warning. There was no obsessive-compulsive disorder, nor any interference from flashbacks. We simply stopped after getting fed up and hugged each other. My wife could stay and hug without having to get up and take a shower immediately. We were very happy, unable to explain or believe what had just happened. Unfortunately, this feeling didn't last long. Later, we tried several times again, but the results weren't satisfactory. About a month later, sexual activity (in terms of sexual intercourse) once again came to a standstill.

March was a difficult month for me because I turned thirty. My parents were getting old and I had always wanted to be a young father. Thirty seemed to have become my defining characteristic, and the youthful traits no longer suited me. Over the past eight years, I have struggled for this dream (and many others), leaving traces. I feel exhausted and for some reason, I feel hopeless. Thank God, he protected me during this dark period.

In April, I discovered Happy Pi. These stories gave me the greatest motivation and helped me completely overcome my addiction to pornography. Because Happy Pi is dedicated to promoting hot monogamy, I am confident that my wife will accept this website.

So while I was using Skype, I sent her a link. To our surprise, we began to overcome more sexual obstacles together. On Skype, she read some messages and was extremely excited, starting to masturbate. She hadn't done this for over 15 years. The same happened the next night. She even invented the abbreviation "VWV" (Vives of VWV) to send me messages. During the following weekend, we had a wonderful sexual experience in the bathtub. Just thinking about it makes me excited. This weekend my wife couldn't come home, but I was curious about what would happen next week... It felt like we were newlyweds, and I loved her more than ever before.