It is widely believed that the initial sexual attraction and excitement with a new partner will soon fade away. I listened to the TED talk by psychologist Esther Perel titled "The Secret to Desire in a Long-Term Relationship". She began by asking, "So why does a good sex life often disappear, even for couples who still deeply love each other? Why does a good intimate relationship not guarantee a good sex life, contrary to the common belief? Or, the next question is, can we still desire what we already have?" She then discussed how security and care can be at odds with desire. Despite the title, I don't think she offered any solutions to this dilemma other than learning to accept it.
However, not all couples experience this decline in sexual attraction. In the book "Why Men Want Sex and Women Need Love: Unraveling the Mysteries of Desire", the authors point out that about 5% of couples do not lose their initial sexual desire. However, they do not delve into why some couples retain their initial passion. I am very curious about what makes these 5% of couples different. Perhaps we can take some measures to help maintain sexual desire.
When I read here about the exciting sexual adventures and desires of couples who have been married for a long time, I believe that most of these 5% have found the way to the marital heat :-) I am very interested in hearing the stories of couples who have been married for a long time and no longer consider themselves newlyweds, but still, at least occasionally, feel extremely excited about having sex with their spouse. You can't believe it, among all the people on earth, you can have sex with him/her!
You can comment on: Describe your current feelings about your sex life with your spouse and how you felt about your spouse when you first met... How does your feeling for your future spouse differ from those you have dated? Are there any reasons in your dating and married life that make you long for your future spouse for a long time? Or is there anything unique about your spouse that attracts you?
This is anonymous, so don't be shy or afraid to brag!