I mentioned earlier that although I don't like pornographic films, I am very interested in videos showing real couples having sex. This is very enlightening and helps me get away from embarrassment and disgust. I also discovered that videos of men masturbating and having sexy conversations (preferably without their faces showing) are very attractive. Sometimes, while rubbing or stroking myself, I would watch (or just listen to) these videos, imagining the scene of me having sex with my future husband.

Sometimes it's hard for me to imagine what my man would say or what his voice would sound like, so these videos/audio clips make my scenario feel more real. I hope I'm not wrong. I have no sexual desire or addiction issues towards the man in the video. But I'd be happy to hear the feedback from other committed single people on MH. Do you use any form of stimulation (videos, audio, toys, mirrors) to help you fantasize about your future partner?

When it comes to mirrors, about three times before self-pleasuring, I began to self-pleasure in front of the mirror, leaning against the bed, legs spread apart. I explored the vulva with one hand while extending my middle finger in. I could almost see my future husband sitting behind me, his hand holding mine, teasing and stimulating my mons pubis together. That feeling was very intense, and to some extent, also a bit sweet. When I was a teenager, I even didn't dare to look at my naked self in the mirror because I thought it was too inappropriate and embarrassing. Now, I confidently display my feminine traits (though it's in a secluded bedroom!) and admire myself in the mirror. These things have helped me grow in the realm of sex and allowed me to plan in advance which day would bring great pleasure to a certain man. This is my goal, second only to loving Jesus and pleasing Jesus. This website is one of the tools, and thank God for guiding me to this place.